Have you ever thought about your life as if you were a painter and your life was your canvas?
I like to think of it like that sometimes.
Cause, you are the artist of your own life and you get to paint it any way you want, Your brush strokes are the decisions you make every day of your life.
Small everyday decisions and the big life changing ones.
I was talking with my daughter a few nights ago about just that, decisions.
You know, decisions like......
“Do I want to get married?”
Do I want to wear white after Labor Day?
“Do I want to have a family?”
Do “I want to own a mini van and live in the suburbs ?”
Do I want to sell everything I own and travel the world on cruise ships?
As it turns out she had some very firm opinions on some of these decisions.
I learned that night my daughter thinks its weird when people decide to not have children. In her mind she thinks every single solitary woman in the world "should" nurture children whether they give birth to them, foster them or adopt them.
Of course I launched into a firm rebuttal … "This is a great time to be a woman"" I said "Now it's not as unusual for women to decide to not have children or not get married, you can be truer to yourself now. Every woman should decide for herself what she wants her life to be about because honey parenting and marriage are not for the faint of heart." (This of course was met with an eyeroll because everyone should get married to according to her)
She looked at me like I was crazy.
"So, do you regret having us?" she quipped
“Wait, what? No!!! of course not!!!! But, since you're asking, I wish I would have stopped and thought about it and made a conscious decision. I didn’t and that’s the truth. "
In that moment I realized the apple is not falling far from the tree I used to be. Truly, Aly is only modeling what she sees in the majority of adult women in her life, we've grown up. gotten married and had children.
I wonder how many of us would have done that if we had other examples around us?
Lucky for me the motherhood thing worked out for me. The kids are more than alright. I wouldn't want to be without them but, it didn't have to turn out that way.
Take time to think about every decision you make. Don’t just do something because you think every woman "should". Do what makes you inexplicably happy. Create your own fucking brilliant canvas! xo