Over the holiday’s, my son Tanner and I went to Power Hour at CycleBar. Power Hour simply means you go hard for an hour as opposed to the 45 minute traditional CycleBar class. Power Hour is my favorite.
I surveyed the room as I looked in the mirror, ready to go, clipped on to the pedals of my bike, #16, right there in the front row. I observed the ratio of men to women deciding where I thought I would come in in the standings at the end of class. On this day, I concluded, I could expect to come in in the top 12. I knew that Tanner would most likely come in first but I hoped I wouldn’t be too far behind.
So, I went hard as I always do, my legs felt amazing as I powered through the jumps and climbs. Cycling in the studio is my favorite form of exercise. It’s the first kind of exercise class I’ve ever loved.
At the end of the class, Tanner and I were walking out to the car both searching for our stats in our email.
“Of course, I’m sure you came in first” I said.
I’m not even sure if he answered because I simultaneously pressed on my email, looked at my stats and shouted “I came in second!!!!” I was estatic for that moment, in a class of 23 with 6 men I had come in 2nd!
But do you know what my first thought was after that?
“That can’t be right. It must be a mistake.”
Wait, did I just think that? Did I just think “That can’t be right?”
After all of the thought work I have done on myself there was a sneaky little negative thought, that uncovered a whole negative belief system that says….
“I’m not as good as other riders, especially males.”
I’ve got some work to do on this thought cause I know it isn’t true but, some how that thought is in my my brain.
So, with this new year still fresh and shiny, I vow to do more thought work to uncover more of these sneaky slippery little belief systems that could hold me back from all of the success I crave.
Doing thought work isn’t a one time or two time or 100 time deal, it’s a life time endeavor. And, it’s a task I am willing to do. I want to continue to be a watcher of my own brain and do the work it takes to clean up my own thinking. I’ve got much to do, and I don’t need my own brain holding me back and neither do you.